Thursday, August 19, 2010

A Very Unwelcomed Event...

So, as I mentioned in my last post a little blurb about how I felt like my birth control implant was messing me up...well it did quite a little number to me this week. For the past, almost 2 months, I have felt extreme discomfort fairly consistantly throughout the day, everyday. I had a really strong nervous feeling...butterflies times a million for no absolute reason. My heart would race and pound really fast and really hard which made me dizzy and light-headed. I also would shake, almost like I had the cold chills except that I was really hot! My shakes were so bad that at night, it would wake Josh up and he's no light sleeper. It literally drained my energy everyday.

After dealing with this for so long, I had enough. I scheduled an appointment in Dallas with my "girly-doctor" which happened to be on my birthday. All of this happened also while all my sisters and their husbands/fiance were intown from Utah for our August birthday celebrations. So bummed! Anyway, at my appointment, I told my doctor all of my symptoms and that I needed this out of my arm asap. Well, she wouldn't do it. She drew about 4 viles of blood to test for a few things but I knew it wasn't going to return any results. I was devastated. In my gut, ever since the beginning, I knew my birth control was the cause. Well I went home...and cried. I didn't want to have this anymore. We need to finish up our summer here in Houston, prepare for our long-haul home, school starts and we're leaving for Cancun in less than 3 weeks! I want to feel like myself and feel good for another new semester!

After celebrating my dad and I's birthday on Monday on the lake, we went home and for some reason kept feeling this sharp, quick little pulse of pain on the left side of my chest. I ignored it, I was so tired and just went to bed. About 5am, I woke up with my heart racing again except this time, I literally thought my heart would give out because it was pounding so hard. I started to get up to go to the restroom and the entire room started spinning. I was so light-headed. I made my way to my mom and dad's room and laid down next to my mom to have her check my pulse rate. Luckily she works in the cardiac department of our hospital. She felt my heart and rolled over to wake my dad up to have him feel it. Immediately, we were getting dressed to go to the emergency room. I was terrified! My dad said he's never felt a heart beat so hard that it was moving my whole ribcage. All along, I knew this was my birth control. The nurse put about 12 patches on me and hooked me up for an EKG. They also drew another 5-6 viles of blood for more testing. We were there for about 4 hours and the doctor said everything was normal except to get the birth control out! Thank you, Dr! I knew it!!! My gyno doctor is in the same hospital so I went upstairs right after I was released to tell her what had happened. She still didn't believe the birth control was the cause but I didn't care, I just told her to take it out and she did!

Ever since Tuesday, I haven't had any episodes and feel pretty good except for that I'm extremely tired and will be until my hormones balance out again. But that's normal. I've been a little emotional (not from hormones) but because it really touches my heart how my parents dropped everything to help me get this taken care of and how loving and supportive my family is in times of need. I'm also so very thankful that my Heavenly Father has watched over me and blessed me quite a bit throughout this entire ordeal. I'm so thankful for all the love and concern from family and loved ones, I can't ask for any better people in my life...

Thursday, August 5, 2010

Just a lil' update...

Well, our time here in Texas is almost up. I'm so sad but also ready to get back to Utah to finish up school there. A lot of people have asked about our plans for the next few years so why not share it with everyone?! Here goes...

As fast has this summer has come and gone, we'll be done here in Houston by the end of the month and headed back to Utah. Not looking forward to the drive but it's inevitable. We have one more semester at Snow College in Ephraim and then by Christmas break, we plan to move up to Layton for another year of school at Weber State. Josh has been really excited to go to Weber, they have the only Technical Sales program on this side of the Mississippi. He wants to pursue medical sales as his ultimate career, as of right now. He kinda waivers back and forth between a few different things but it's medical sales for right now. As soon as we're done in Layton, we will be heading back to the Great State of Texas, buying a house and getting our roots dug in. We've been looking online and getting MILLIONS of ideas for when we do buy a house. We're dying to buy a fixer-upper and do what we want to the place, I'm so excited, I can hardly stand it.

As much as I love that Josh has this opportunity for a job with Platinum and it really has been very good to us, I am just not the type to pack up and move every 6-8 months. Im a consistant type of person and it's hard to keep a routine under the circumstances. Which kinda leads me to the next tidbit.

I've had alot of anxiety lately. Most of it is unexplained, like, I don't know the cause for it because I'm not really stressed or under pressure. I've done a lot of research and it's either Generalized Anxiety Disorder or my birth control implant. But it just comes over me several times a day during a bad week and several times a week for a good week. I've never had it this bad. It makes me so weak, nauseated, light-headed and really emotional. I would even wake up in the middle of the night shaking so bad that it wakes Josh up, and that's no easy task! To clear the air, several people have asked if I was pregnant. No, I most definatly am not. I hate it though, I've almost been kinda reclusive the last month or so. I get so nervous to go out with everyone and have a break-down. I felt so bad for Josh a few weeks ago. He had the hardest day ever and I already wasn't feeling too good. I called my mom, this was before Josh got home, and I was crying and sobbing like a baby- I couldn't control it! It felt like a panic attack because I almost couldn't breathe. My mom kinda talked me through it and I was okay for the time being but as soon as Josh walked through the door, it started all over again. It was a long night to say the least. If anyone has any tips, ideas or advice, it's greatly welcomed.

Overall though, this has been a great summer. Josh has done really well selling. Leo loves it here as opposed to our basement apartment in Utah. He loves sitting on the balcony watching the birds and soaking up the sun. I have loved being relatively close to my family this summer. We've been able to spend a lot of time together and have LOVED every minute of it. Next week, Devin and her boyfriend, Dallas and Jordan and her husband, Blaine are all driving here for a big August birthday bash. Jordan's birthday is today, Josh's is on the 11th, my dad and I share a birthday on the 16th and Dallas's is on the 23rd. We figured that since were all in town and my mom's birthday is Sept. 10th that she could pretend to be an August baby as well and celebrate hers since we'll all be in town. I'll update party pics as soon as possible...

Anyway, that's our story for now. Next time I update, it may be from Utah...

Goodbye Texas, I heart you.