Just thoughts...

I don't know why but somedays, I get very contemplative. These past few days, I've had alot of time to reflect on my life, people who've influenced me, trials, blessings and family. I recently had a dream and I have them pretty often of my grandparents who've passed away some years ago. I like to think they're just checking in on me to see how Im doing or to at least let me see their faces. When they died- I always worried I would forget alot of the little things that I loved about them, like my grandpa's chuckle when he laughed or my grandma's sense of humor.

My grandmother was paralyzed on her left side ever since I was a baby so I never saw her walk on her own or heard her speak full and clear sentences. She was a beautician for years before her stroke so she/and I loved to do her make-up and paint her nails. They were my biggest example of christlike love, especially my grandpa who bent over backwards to make her his first priority above himself to see that she had what she needed and was fully taken care of. After he died, though I was young, I remember my heart broke for her because I couldn't comprehend the void that left her.

Now that Im married I can imagine just an ounce of how that must have felt. I don't need to rely on Josh for every need (YET!) but with him, I know what it's like to have a husband that is there for you at any given moment knowing that if you ever needed anything that he would gladly do so. And I for him. My grandparents remind me that physically we may not be together forever but spiritually we will be, same for my family. I hate being so far away from them- I haven't seen them since April and won't be able to see them until Christmas. It breaks my heart some days knowing I won't get my hugs or hear their laughs but I know we're still family and though we may be far from eachother for awhile, that I still love them and would do anything for any one of them. Its such a blessing to have eternal relationships, whether its family, spouses or friends and for the impact they have on you as a human being and the world around you. Just think about that and see if you would be the person you are today without having that example in your life...

I hope that I can someday be the example that my grandparents were to me. xoxo